Destiny..

It was just around the corner,
I stretched my hands to catch it,
I felt the soft tenderness across my fingers,
Yet, when I tried cajoling it, there was emptiness.

As I stood on my toes,
I could see it with a sly smile spread across its face,
Like the Cheshire cat,
Inviting me to hold it.

The faster I ran,
It further increased its speed,
As I perceived it to be near,
The farther it actually was.

As hours became days,
And days became months,
Wishes turned to dreams,
Waiting for them to manifest into reality.

One fine day, there was a knock,
And a beautiful package was delivered,
As I felt the warmth in my hands,
I realized that it shall come to you when it is prepared,
Destiny cannot be chased; it always reaches out to you!!

May their souls rest in peace!!

It was a cool evening, the clouds looked pregnant enough to burst any moment. People call it the perfect Bangalore weather. The right time for a cup of hot tea and some pakodas, but I was on my way for a doctor’s appointment. As I stopped at a traffic signal, I saw a group of young boys in their colorful tees and half pants playing cricket. People would normally call this a wonderful sight but I was yards away from feeling wonderful about it. This had nothing to do with my laziness that has set in me in the recent years. Well, I was appalled to see these children play in a grave yard right adjacent to a busy road. The Government decided to expand the main road to ease traffic congestion and decided to break into the grave yard. The poor children of the city then decided to make best use of whatever little space was available to them and converted it into a play ground. Should I be appreciating these kids for their nouvelle idea or sympathize with them for the lack of space?

I remember as a child, I never faced a dearth of space to play, if it was, it was always lack of time, which was a problem. And of course that also was not a big deal as I didn’t have television eating up too much of my outdoors time. Treasure hunts, replays of the famous five and the secret seven, rock climbing were our normal games as there was always place to hide and to imagine one to be isolated on Kirrin Island. Cricket was something one would play in the limited area of their compound or on the neighborhood street. One was scared of breaking window panes and flower pots while playing but I can’t imagine myself to be scared of ghosts creeping out of their graves whilst I while away my free time with friends. I wonder where this leaves the generations to come. Where would they be playing? Or should I be asking where would they be living? On houses built over grave yards?

It feels nice to see images of India with marvelous commercial complexes and even more wonderful apartment buildings. However, are we missing out something bigger in the picture? I am sure we are. As humans we have aesthetic sense to admire a painting with lush green meadows, silver cascades, and the bright blue sky. I remember a tapestry that I saw when I was a child; a bunch of kids of different age groups playing in a park with the new-moms and their little one in prams. It’s been two decades since I first saw that tapestry, yet I still search embroidery houses for a similar one. The simplicity of the picture has left a deep bonding; it captured the normal evening routine of my childhood. Would my child appreciate the beauty of the picture or would he think it’s a wonderful dream captured on a tapestry?

All that I can do is wonder how the deceased must be feeling with little kids’ legs running over them to catch a ball or as they watch their white homes being made as a boundary for a four. Will they ever be able to sleep among the sounds of sixes and wickets? May their souls rest in peace!!

The chase aint ever over..

The farther you try to run from your past, the faster it chases you. This is what my father told me after watching a movie where the protagonist tries to run away from his past. I then started thinking which I rarely do. Is my father right?

As humans, it is but natural to have a past. What I don’t seem to understand is how the word ‘past’ has taken a negative connotation over the recent times. Past could be anything, it could be a lovely relationship to a shady affair. It could be a memorable moment to a ghastly accident. It could just be anything that happened as recent as a second ago. It is a situation which we were part of. Is it necessary for us to run away from these when it turns out to be a miserable past?

Forgetting the bitter moments of our life paves the way for a happier tomorrow but running away from them just makes it harder to forget. Shutting the boundaries of those yesterdays, closing the doors to all those people involved, will push the boundaries and doors so hard that the bricks break and create worse wounds than ever imagined. Bandaging the severed wounds doesn’t help either; the wounds can just come loose and spill out the infection. As the best cure to an injury is to leave the wound open, the best way to heal the terrible moments in life is not to bandage them but to leave them open, time heals everything.

Another chance, just another chance...

As a kid, I always wanted to grow up. I thought college and work would be more fun than going to school in an olive green tunic and white blouse with a school bag on my back and a water bottle slung across my shoulders. I still remember the fantasy lands that my sis, friends and I created as kids imagining ourselves to be working. We called it ‘Office Office’. Now, don’t ask me why the double office. I guess saying office twice helped us believe that we were actually enacting a future real-life situation

Now, getting back to the point, I always wanted to grow up. I wanted to finish school and get to college and then was always looking forward to finish college to start work. Looking back at those twenty odd years of my life, I feel like a moron. How could I ever want to grow out of my childhood? How I wish I could relive all those years? There are so many things that I would like to do better, so many things I wish I hadn’t done, so many people with whom I could have dealt differently and lots of things I would like to do again.

I remember when I was in my final year of graduation, a group of friends sat down and we were reminiscing about our initial years in college, our reaction to certain issues and our immaturity. We believed that we had matured over four years of college, not sure if that is true, though! Now, when my mind wanders to that conversation, I wonder, why can’t I get another chance? A chance, to revisit those situations, to handle them with more maturity; yet, another thought pops into my mind. Why do we always look back at years gone by? Is it so difficult for us to live days as they come by?

I guess, the answer lies in the fact that there is a road taken and a road not taken. Our decision to travel in a particular path is influenced by many factors. Sometimes, emotions have a role to play or it could be practical reasoning or just because it is a road already traveled. However, we are pulled back to old memories and situations because we speculate, as an after thought, the consequence of traversing through the ‘road not taken’. The itch, to relive those moments is nagging as our mind delivers more beautiful results when we enact the role play that never happened. Well, can we do anything about it? I don’t know but all that I can say is:

“Give me some sunshine, Give me some rain; Give me another chance, I wanna grow up once again!!!”